Changed Haiti

I have been back in Haiti for 2 weeks now, and am beginning to understand the changes that have taken place as a result of the earthquake. As someone who lived and worked here for a year before the earthquake happened, it is easy to see some changes, but others are hidden much deeper. I can see the devastation in terms of buildings, rubble, and seas of blue tarpaulin that make up people's tents. I can see how little people have as whole extended families live on a patch of ground 2m by 3m. I can see the dirt and dust, more of it than before, and people washing in the street trying to maintain whatever dignity they can. What is harder to see is the bewilderment as they wonder if this is how they will live forever, and the sense of hopelessness as they try just to get enough food for each day. Many people seem lost. Some think this is the end. And yet there is real hope: the pride in staff as they work, wanting to do the best job they can; the smile that lights up a child's face as I pass by; knowing that whatever I do may be so little, but it better than doing nothing at all. Haiti has changed beyond recognition, but my job here now is to bring hope and to do what little I can that will change someone's life for the better. I am glad to be here!

Christmas Anxiety

Yes... it's that time of year again. What is about Christmas that changes when you get older? Life used to be so simple. You started thinking about Christmas in December, and the only things to worry about were when the tree was going to get put up, which forest my Dad was going to get it from in the dead of night, how to decorate it, and presents. Now I start planning in October!! Who will I spend Christmas with this year? How will it work? When will we see everyone else? How can I avoid upsetting everyone? That's something my brother has not so far mastered - something to do with having 2 children that all the Grandparents want to see. I, of course, will also be working Christmas Day providing a meal for the disadvantaged, people who on the whole don't have anywhere else to go on Christmas Day, and will be helped by a lot of volunteers who will give up their day to help. I was on the phone discussing this very dilemma of what to do this Christmas with my brother last night and spoke to my 4-year-old niece, who for no reason at all said "Je t'aime, Marraine." So, I hope I will remember this year that having a family to divide time between is a blessing that should not be forgotten.

I was on holiday recently and combined a number of things. I took the ferry from Portsmouth to Le Havre, and drove to the Loire to stay at my Dad's. After a few days I went to the Charente to visit my Mum, and finally went to Belgium to visit my brother and family in Belgium on the way home. I like to measure holiday success in a number of ways: number of books read, number of days when the sun shone, and how relaxed I feel by the end. This holiday was a great success! Number of books read: 12. Number of days the sun shone: 12. Relaxation level: 7. Interesting how the books were all read before I got to my brother's house, where my older niece said when she heard I was coming "J'adore ma Marraine!!" And I believe she does. I took her to school, played with her when she got home, and generally had a lot of fun that did not involve any reading whatsoever... So perhaps I need a new holiday measure - amount of fun had with Eloisa!

As I have just moved to Poplar, it is hard to believe I have spent the last 2 years in Bradford. I loved my work there, made some good friends, and it was sad to leave. But I am a person who likes to embrace change, and so I am looking forward to my new life in Poplar. Living in London is great, and being closer to my family will be a relief for a while. Considering I am living at the William Booth Training College, somewhere I spent 2 fairly miserable years when training to be a Salvation Army Officer, I am remarkably happy in my new little flat. I am orienting myself to the area again, getting used to a faster and very different lifestyle and am excited about what the future may hold. God always seems to have big surprises just around the corner, so who knows what the next few months may bring...